Bigunreal said:
And McWigger insists on slowing down the offense and forcing the run with the decidedly pedestrian Ridley (not mention the awful Bolden). Vereen is better than those two (and thus used less frequently by this genius), but as well all know, the best RB on the team by far-Woodhead-is always relegated to a change of pace, limited touches role. And, as has been pointed out here ad infinitum, it's like they want to keep his ypc unimpressive, by exclusively running him up the middle, which hardly plays to his strengths.
Thank you for another astounding overall post. Hector Longo writes for a New England newspaper called the
“Eagle Tribune.” He is perhaps the most honest critic of New England’s players and coaches, both black and white. For five long years, he’s been a brazen supporter of Wes Welker (calling him the NFL’s most valuable receiver, pleading for the Krafts to sign him to a long contract, etc) and many other white players. Every week, Longo “grades” the Patriot’s positional performances, and last week, he wrote the following drivel concerning Danny Woodhead…
Running Backs (D) … Violently inconsistent from week to week. Just didn’t see Stevan Ridley run hard in a 16-for-34 night. Brandon Bolden had just six touches. Why Danny Woodhead continues to see much playing time, when this team needs to run out the clock, is beyond me. He’s a 3-to-4 touch change of pace, that’s all. Anything else brings on diminishing returns.
Of course, this laughable, outrageously-erroneous statement represents the exact inverse of truth. For instance, Woodhead was removed from kick return duty and Devin McCourty was inserted. McCourty, the once-promising rookie cornerback who has been frightfully-terrible since the 2010 season, has been even more awful this year at “covering” receivers and tight ends. Could McCourty, the Grand Champion Supreme of the
“Burned Black Backfield Bunch,
” have chosen a more preposterous time and place in which to fumble? If only “little” Danny Woodhead (who towers over superstars like Ray Rice and Maurice Jones-Drew) had fielded that kickoff…
CAPTION: Yet Another Blunder for Devin “The Dunce” McCoutry
Kaptain said:
But alas the Pats will exit the playoffs (if they make it) the same way they seem to lose every game. They'll get behind with their blackest offense and then they'll try too late to overcome the deficit with their whitest offense. This has been the formula in the past and it shows no signs of changing - especially with McWigger at the helm. We already know he won't change even when he is proven to be an idiot.
When not operating in the “no huddle,” New England’s offense is as dreadful and ineffective as any other. I found it quite telling when the nauseating playcalling of
“Little Joshy Wiggy Piggy” drew boos from the fans in the 4[SUP]th[/SUP] quarter. New England’s fanbase is accustomed to seeing exciting, pass-happy, high-scoring affairs, and despite having the best receiver of a generation (Wes Welker) on their squad, they’ve been mostly subjected to viewing utter mediocrity this season. Ridley and Bolden are average backs, and Vereen is talented, but a less-dynamic version of Woodhead. Of course, when New England truly needs to move the ball and score points, Joshy-Wig’s gelatinous spine becomes rigid, and Danny is his chosen back. Woodhead’s 20-yard reception literally saved this hollow victory for New England…
CAPTION: Feloniously-Underutilized White Running Back
Similarly, when New England’s defense requires a sack, a critical stop, or a turnover, Rob Ninkovich (the “diversity” of the defensive unit) delivers…
CAPTION: Ninkovich’s Game-Clinching Sack of Ditry Sanchez
That was Ninkovich’s 4[SUP]th[/SUP] forced fumble of the season, to go along with 27 tackles, 4 sacks, and 2 fumble recoveries. With Steve Gregory injured, Ninkovich, Vince Wilfork, and rookie Chandler Jones are the only NFL caliber starters. Then again, with so many white backups who never play (Trevor Scott, Jake Bequette, Bobby Carpenter, Jeff Tarpinian, Niko Koutouvides, Nate Ebner), who knows, there could be room for improvement? Their defensive backfield, in particular, couldn’t get any worse.
Wes Welker, the NFL’s most dynamic, unstoppable, impossible-to-cover offensive playmaker, was thoroughly snubbed and only caught his second pass 3 minutes into the 3[SUP]rd[/SUP] quarter, finishing with 6 catches for 66 yards. Many of these catches occurred in critical, game-prolonging situations, however. For whatever reason, Welker always seems to have muted success against the Jets…
CAPTION: The Great One Intentionally Ignored
Thankfully, despite the best efforts of the coaching staff, the NFL’s premiere tight end did manage to salvage a decent outing, finishing with 6 catches for 78 yards and 2 TDs, dragging pygmy-sized black defenders as though they were little black rag dolls…
CAPTION: Gronk TD #1
CAPTION: Gronk TD #2
New England may win their division, but unless they correct their innumerable flaws, it would take a miracle for them to advance in the playoffs this season. After this undeserved win, I think they’ll turn it around next week against the Rams in London. Steve Gregory and Logan Mankins are both set to return, which will give them 2 more white starters.
How sweet was the Texas-sized lashing of Baltimore administered by the Texans? John Harbaugh, the insufferable Plantation Boss, appeared quite distressed. His team of athletic, tar-hued thugs (Flacco, Pitta, Birk, Yanda, and Kruger being the only saving grace) were not only outclassed, outrun, outsmarted, and outmuscled by the Texans’ white players, they also “lost their cool” on numerous occasions, punching, kicking, scrapping, pushing officials, screaming with anguish on almost every play in the absence of their “spiritual leader,” Ray Lewis. Poor babies.
The ever-reliable
“Negro Veneration Machine,” Dan Dingleberrydork, logged an Emmy-winning performance in his poetic, saliva-frothing excitement for the glorious return of Terrell “Monsterface” Suggs, who seems to have grown even more hideous than ever before...
CAPTION: All-American Sex Symbol Poses Yesterday
Dierdorf, the disgrace-o-skin whose name translates to
“deer village” in South German dialect, was quite smitten with Suggs, shouting with merriment at his every accomplishment (that is, 4 tackles and 1 lame coverage sack). When Suggs logged the sack, a rush of blood flowed to Dan's penis in a state of Afrocentric euphoria, with Danny Girl exclaiming:
“I’m so happy to see him back! Nobody thought he could do it so quickly…but here he is, making plays! This is a true miracle, the NFL Defensive Player of the Year has returned!” What Danielle failed to mention is that Sluggs appeared to have packed on an additional 20-30 lbs of flab onto his already-chunky frame. His cellulite-ridden thunder-thighs would make the CultMarx Queen, Oprah Winfrey, blush…
CAPTION: Sluggs Returns, “Large” and In Charge
Matt Schaub threw for 256 yards, 165 yards (64%) of which went to white receivers (Kevin Walter, Owen Daniels, Garrett Graham, and James Casey). Kevin Walter, in particular, had a fine outing. As JimmyC mentioned, Schaub missed him badly on several long bombs in which Walter had beaten the athletically-inferior DB, but they did manage to connect on a nice touchdown…
CAPTION: Walter Tallies 4 Catches for 74 Yards and a TD
CAPTION: Daniels Tallies 7 Catches for 59 Yards and a TD
Although the “Nordic Beast,” JJ Watt, didn’t record a sack, his first batted pass resulted in an INT/TD and another forced a punt in a critical situation. Connor Barwin filled the void, abusing sumos and recording a sack/safety and a beautiful batted pass…
CAPTION: Connor Barwin Records a Safety
Of course, the always-homoerotic Danielle Dingleberryd-ckhead kept confusing Watt and Barwin during the game. He also confused Garrett Graham with Kevin Walter twice. It’s understandable, since all of us whites probably “look the same” to him.
The sudden emergence of Jordy Nelson has been a mirror image of his success last season. That is, ignored until the coaching staff realizes that the NFL’s most talented outside receiving threat is on the roster. Unlike last season, where Nelson barely played (but still finished with 68 catches for 1,263 yards and 15 TD’s), Nelson seems to play nearly every snap, especially since with the white-male-emasculating star of those bile-ejecting
“Old Spice” commercials, Greg Jennings, injured. And it only took five years!
CAPTION: Nelson Notches 8 Catches, 122 Yards, TD
If only Green Bay would allow John Kuhn to receiver more touches. The powerback tallied 32 yards on 4 touches. Clay Matthew had another sack…
CAPTION: Matthews’ 9[SUP]th[/SUP] Sack
As Bigunreal mentioned, any combination of the Patriots, Broncos, or Texans would make a great AFC Championship Game. There are slim pickings in the NFC, with the Packers, Rams, Vikings (Gerhart's treatment notwithstanding), and Cowboys being the most white friendly squads.