ToughJ.Riggins
Hall of Famer
Considering he's a Dolphin football player- all he'd have to say is something like this:
BH: "I was out at the club in South Beach...I was dancin with two girls who were big Dolphin fans, I barely said a word, they introduced themselves to me and kept talkin like them celebrity chasers do. The last song that played was that "Take me Home Tonight" song. One of the girls was good to drive. So the one girl drove as the other sat on my lap...No seat belt, sorry officer...as they sung along to that stupid song "No Scrubs" playin on my radio...Damn I hate that..."
Officer: "You're digressin.."
BH: "We got over to my friends house, but there were no condoms in the house. I told the girls...well, if you'd like- you could pick up a package of Trojan Magnums...just take my car, I know you'll love the bling bling on that thing...Both girls left in my car and never came back. I guess something must have happened and they ditched the car...girls never leave me "hangin". The next thing you know...I'm talking to you officers...My wife will not get word of this statement will she? Could bring big trouble for our relationship..."
Officer: "Actually Mr. big mouth, I saw your wife right in the kitchen when I exited your restroom...Did you not know she was home?"
BH: "No I..."
Brian's wife (as she runs into the Den from the kitchen): "You!...I got a golf club and will beat you silly like Tiger Woods!..."
Brian: "Put down the golf club!...Officer please disarm her!..."
Officer: "Honey...He's all yours...I'm leavin...Peace!...And if his Heartline stops, I won't let the police department know."
Officer quickly leaves through the front door and once outside speaks to himself softly as he hears yelps and groans inside, he has a smirk on his face:
"Em athletes think they can get away with anythin...He may have evaded em law, but he won't evade an angry wife with a golf club. They brought Tiger down and my 2nd cousin Pac Man went down. It's usually only the bruthas- who trouble themselves out of a job. Finally a white balla that Jesse, Al and em' Brownie Scout/ white Rivals couldn't keep off em' field goes down...Damn I forgot about that black Panther meeting yesterday after I got home from the police department. Thank God I can keep things on the Down and low, betta than Pacman, Tiger and Mr...his Heartline just stopped".
All the sudden the intense screaming that the "officer" was hearing stops and there is an eerie silence. "Officer" softly mumbles:
"Black Power".
Anyway, JK...Hopefully this thing won't turn into a Tiger Woods like story- considering I was really rooting for Brian on the field last year.
Edited by: ToughJ.Riggins
BH: "I was out at the club in South Beach...I was dancin with two girls who were big Dolphin fans, I barely said a word, they introduced themselves to me and kept talkin like them celebrity chasers do. The last song that played was that "Take me Home Tonight" song. One of the girls was good to drive. So the one girl drove as the other sat on my lap...No seat belt, sorry officer...as they sung along to that stupid song "No Scrubs" playin on my radio...Damn I hate that..."
Officer: "You're digressin.."
BH: "We got over to my friends house, but there were no condoms in the house. I told the girls...well, if you'd like- you could pick up a package of Trojan Magnums...just take my car, I know you'll love the bling bling on that thing...Both girls left in my car and never came back. I guess something must have happened and they ditched the car...girls never leave me "hangin". The next thing you know...I'm talking to you officers...My wife will not get word of this statement will she? Could bring big trouble for our relationship..."
Officer: "Actually Mr. big mouth, I saw your wife right in the kitchen when I exited your restroom...Did you not know she was home?"
BH: "No I..."
Brian's wife (as she runs into the Den from the kitchen): "You!...I got a golf club and will beat you silly like Tiger Woods!..."
Brian: "Put down the golf club!...Officer please disarm her!..."
Officer: "Honey...He's all yours...I'm leavin...Peace!...And if his Heartline stops, I won't let the police department know."
Officer quickly leaves through the front door and once outside speaks to himself softly as he hears yelps and groans inside, he has a smirk on his face:
"Em athletes think they can get away with anythin...He may have evaded em law, but he won't evade an angry wife with a golf club. They brought Tiger down and my 2nd cousin Pac Man went down. It's usually only the bruthas- who trouble themselves out of a job. Finally a white balla that Jesse, Al and em' Brownie Scout/ white Rivals couldn't keep off em' field goes down...Damn I forgot about that black Panther meeting yesterday after I got home from the police department. Thank God I can keep things on the Down and low, betta than Pacman, Tiger and Mr...his Heartline just stopped".
All the sudden the intense screaming that the "officer" was hearing stops and there is an eerie silence. "Officer" softly mumbles:
"Black Power".
Anyway, JK...Hopefully this thing won't turn into a Tiger Woods like story- considering I was really rooting for Brian on the field last year.
Edited by: ToughJ.Riggins