East Regional
1 Duke
The Blue Devils use only one white player, freshman swingman Nikolas Khamenia. He was a borderline five-star recruit but is just the 7th man on this team. Cameron Boozer is probably the number one pick this year; another generation or two of mating with white women, and the family may have bred the black out of their gene pool.
16 Siena
The Saints are led by sophomore guard Gavin Doty, their leading scorer and rebounder. 7-foot center Riley Mulvey now starts due to injury along with forward Brendan Coyle. This team was turned around quickly by second-year coach Gerry McNamara, a former Syracuse sharpshooter. He’s a longshot candidate for the vacant Orange job.
8 Ohio State
The Buckeyes start German center Christoph Tilly and play three more white players off the bench, notably forward Brandon Noel and Indiana transfer Gabe Cupps. Despite the strong floor presence, the white contingent scores less than 25% of the team points.
9 TCU
The Horned Frogs start one white player: point guard Brock Harding, who leads the team with 5.7 assists and 1.7 steals per game. They play guards Liutaurus Lelevicius and Tanner Toolson more than 20 mpg each, too. TCU is unusual in playing three white guards without a “token white big.”
5 St. John’s
Rick Pitino’s teams have never been white-centric and this season’s Red Storm team is no different. Washington State transfer guard Dylan Darling plays about half the game as a 7th man. There are two other guards from Greece on the deeper bench.
12 Northern Iowa
The Panthers start three white bigs: Tristan Smith, Ben Schwieger, and Will Hornseth. They play a fairly deep bench and use guards Max Weisbrod and RJ Taylor off the bench, along with forward Kyle Pock. They play a slow tempo and will need to defend and rebound very well to have a chance at the upset.
4 Kansas
Bill Self has recruited white blue-chips in the past, but this Jayhawks team doesn’t have any. Freshman swing guard Kohl Rosario plays about 8 inconsequential minutes per game.
13 California Baptist
Seven-foot sophomore Bradley Henige has moved into the starting lineup for the Lancers. He’s the only white player in the rotation and mostly sets picks for his teammates.
6 Louisville
The Cardinals start Virginia transfer Isaac McKneely, who averages 10.5, 3, and 1.5. He’s the only white player apart from the end of the bench.
11 South Florida
The Bulls have a familiar face in Joseph Pinion, who dwelled on an all-black bench at Arkansas for two seasons before building his stock back up with a year at Arkansas State. Pinion averages 14.2, 3.8, 2.3, and hit six three-pointers in the AAC semifinal. He’s the only white player on the team, a key starter but not necessarily the star.
3 Michigan State
The Spartans have a formidable front court with forward Jaxon Kohler and center Carson Cooper combining to average 23+ points and 16+ rebounds per game. They are key starters on a competitive team; however, there is nobody at all behind them.
14 North Dakota State
The Bison are amongst the most disappointing teams in terms of their economic reliance on “imported goods.” Andy Stefonowicz is the starting point guard and leading assist man. Forward Noah Fedderson is the team’s sixth man. They play a couple more whites in bit roles, but this still seems like quite a misrepresentation of the region’s demographics. Dan Majerle’s son Max rides the deep pine.
7 UCLA
The Bruins lost star stretch big Tyler Bilodeau to injury in the Big Ten Tournament, but he is expected to be back this weekend. Bilodeau leads the team with 17.6 ppg and shoots 46% from deep. That’s it for this Mick Cronin squad, although there is a Jewish kid stashed on the deep bench from near my hometown.
10 UCF
We got pretty far down the list without an oh-fer. The Black Knights came ever so close, but the last guy on the end of the bench is freshman guard Zach Johnson, who will surely not see one solitary moment on the court. Black head coach Johnny Dawkins played at Duke in the 80s. While not confirmed, it is possible that he is mad at whites ever since JJ Redick broke his Blue Devils career scoring record.
2 UConn
The Huskies start star forward Alex Karaban, who seems to unfortunately have decreased his draft stock by playing team-friendly basketball with an ensemble cast. Backup center Eric Reibe chips in 15 minutes per game. Head coach Dan Hurley has a few more white players outside of this year’s regular rotation. This is a hiccup year for UConn overall after Hurley defied his family ways and went noticeably white-friendly.
15 Furman
The Paladins are in the Big Dance despite a rather paltry 10-8 record in the Southern Conference. They start Australian center Charles Johnston and swing guard Asa Thomas. Furman plays a pretty even 8-man rotation that also includes guard Tom House and forward Ben Vander Wal. House scored twenty off the bench last week in the conference semi-finals.
This won't be our favorite region this year - there are more "relatively inoffensive" teams than true caste-busting rooting interests. Northern Iowa, Siena, and Furman are pretty long odds but would technically be most favorable. Michigan State is probably the best bet with two prominent white starters. UConn and UCLA don't offer much past their lone white star with pro potential.
