Tiger seriously hurt in car crash

[Animalmuther0]

Hey the Tiger Jokes are really coming out. Love the last one here.



Apparently, the police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him. She said, "I don't know exactly, but put me down for a 5."Â￾

If the only person that can beat Tiger is a blonde with big breasts, it's time for Phil Mickelson to bleach his hair.

What's the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.

What was Elin doing out at 2.30 in the morning? Clubbing

Why did Tiger crashed into a fire hydrant AND a tree? He couldn't decide between a wood and an iron.

Why did Phil Mickelson call Elin yesterday? To pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger.

What is the penalty for getting it in the wrong hole? Ask Tiger, he knows. Tiger drives very well on the fairway but doesn't fare very well on the driveway. Rock me.

Whats the difference between a golf ball and a caddy? Tiger can drive a golf ball.

Nike wants to drop their endorsement due to accuracy problems. Apparently, Tiger's spraying his balls everywhere.

It turns out that fixing Tiger's game and fixing his marriage both require the same thing: better control over his putz.

Why was Tiger's wife mad at him? She heard that he played a-round in Australia.

What will the headline be if they prove it is domestic violence? TIGER'S WIFE MAKES THE CUT

Given Tiger's racial heritage can we call this a Black Thai affair?

Tiger just changed his nickname but still kept it in the cat family. Cheetah.

Elin Woods has a twin sister named Josephine. Know how to tell them apart? Elin is the one holding the bent 5 iron.

What do Tiger and the Beatles have in common? They both experienced a hit with Norwegian Wood.

First words spoken to the paramedics by Tiger: Who are you? And what are all these trees doing in my living room?

Tiger Wood's shirt is all red- problem is, there's no tournament, and his veins are a pint low.

What does Tiger have in common with a baby seal? They've both been clubbed by a Norwegian.

 

[Europe]

Check out the animated clip made by a Asian tv station showing the incident. It's hilarious. Just type Tiger Woods animated.
For some reason I can't put a link on.

 

[DixieDestroyer]

Check out the animated clip made by a Asian tv station showing the incident. It's hilarious. Just type Tiger Woods animated.
For some reason I can't put a link on.

Here's the oriental news report with the computer animation...hilarious looking indeed!

Tiger Beatdown Animated

 

[Don Wassall]

It's quite probable the opposite will happen andWoods will come out of it at some point more beloved than ever. If Woods has engaged in an affair or two he is doing what a sizeable portion of the adult population has done. The DWFs and the Caste media may at some point feel that Tiger is being unfairly examined and badgered and the pendulum will begin swinging back to the wildly pro-Woods extreme whereit has always been up till now. It will be seen in retrospect as Tiger's "dark period," from which he grew and learned the appropriate lessons while also showing that he is a human being rather than the immortal so many believed him to be. The galleries will then be roaring louder than ever for him and the journalists will continue to swoon in His Presence.

Here we go already, courtesy of Caste clown and Woods devotee Rick Reilly:

What we have here is the first superstar athlete chased down by a digital posse. Rightly or wrongly, the tabloids and the gossip sites got their man in breathtaking speed. To bring down someone as powerful and private as Tiger Woods is like seeing a lion crammed into a bird cage.









When it's all done, Woods will still be the most successful and willful and talented athlete alive, but he will be a much different person than he was -- chastened, humbled and, at long last, human.








If you know the man, the apology Woods issued Wednesday is staggering. For him to speak of "regret" and "personal failings" is unthinkable. It's like a guy who detests snakes being lowered into a pit of them.








This is a man who gives quotes away like a hostile witness in a murder trial. When he answers a question in three words, he's mad he didn't answer it in two. He doesn't even like to reveal yardage.








So all this has to be bamboo shoots under the fingernails of Woods, who's a perfectionist in all things. If he's skiing and falls, he curses himself. If he's playing video games and loses, he insists on a reset. If he's on the tee and misses a fairway, he throws his club in utter disgust. To admit moral failure is a very big loss.








Woods spoke of being "far short of perfect," but you couldn't have blamed him for not noticing. The man won a U.S. Open on a broken leg. He's the first athlete to make a billion dollars. He is on pace to swoop past Jack Nicklaus' record of 18 majors before he's got a gray hair. Maybe when you can make little dimpled golf balls go 340 yards and land in a target the size of a throw rug, you start to believe you can do anything in life and get away with it.








So to come out in front of the world and admit to "transgressions" and letting his family down will shake him to his very core. But, just maybe, it's what he needed.








Though he has the greatest golf game I've ever seen, I've also been critical of Woods for throwing his clubs and swearing and generally being an awful role model for young golfers. Now there's his response to the tabloid stories about his alleged affairs to go with it. None of this makes him a bad person, it only makes him a flawed person, and, now that he's been pilloried publicly, a softer person.








This will cost him millions of dollars and lots of sleepless nights, but in the end, I think he'll be a better man for it.
http://sports.espn.go.com/espnmag/story?id=4707070

 

[Colonel_Reb]

Its too late for Woods to do what Reilly said. He already is balding and getting a little gray in his sideburns.

 

[Bart]

Reilly: "None of this makes him a bad person, it only makes him a flawed person, and, now that he's been pilloried publicly, a softer person. This will cost him millions of dollars and lots of sleepless nights, but in the end, I think he'll be a better man for it."

OMG! These caste clowns are truly pathetic. This kind of soft soap treatment is to be expected. From Tyson to Ray Lewis, to Barkley, to Iverson to Vick. All good guys at heart, not bad, just flawed.

The hard hitting judgmental pieces are reserved for the John Rockers of this world. Now, that guy was evil.

Edit: No way Woods get booed at the Masters or any other event. Vick, who tortured and killed dogs didn't get the Bronx Cheer in Philly, the DWF's cheered when he entered the game. By spring, Tiger will be deified by the press, not vilified. Edited by: Bart

 

[whiteathlete33]

Yep Bart they are all good guys. Just compare the way Mark Chmura's career was cut short to any of the other thugs you mentioned above. Chmura was found not guilty of all charges. Vick, Pacman, and plenty of others didn't receive the same kind of treatment. Convick is back in the league. Pacman was back in the league after receiving multiple chances but I guess some affletes never learn.

 

[DixieDestroyer]

WA33, ConVick returns to Atlanta this Sunday. I'm betting the bruvahz/sistuhz (& DWFs) cheer him wildly, BUT alotta the White fans will boo the sumb-tch.

That slackjawed caste lackey "Dick" Reilly needs to remove his lips from Tiger's nardsack. Tiger's probably been getting tail on the side from day 1 & Reilly says he's "not a bad person"?! Yeh, breaking your marriage vows is the action of a real upstanding citizen.

 

[white is right]

Well the stories seem to be getting more bizarre and less G rated and tending towards R rated. Here is the latest from E tonight........

Dr. Drew Pinsky, of the hugely popular VH1 show "Sex Rehab," tells ET that Tiger Woods could very well be a sex addict himself.

"It's safe to say that sex addiction might be a part of his problem," the TV doctor says, but also adding that with sex addiction there's usually childhood trauma which he has not seen any evidence of with Tiger.

Pinsky says he was shocked when he read the headlines.

"I thought this guy was different," he says. "Celebrities have a very high probability of having issues in their interpersonal lives and it turns out he may be no different than many celebrities and athletes."

The doctor believes Tiger and his family are going through a very emotional time.

"Tiger is probably going through guilt and shame -- that's typically what the person who gets caught is going through," he says. "They beat themselves up rather badly. The spouse is going through disbelief and trying to come to terms with betrayal, and the life that she thought she was living has been completely altered."

But Pinsky feels it's possible for Tiger to get through this, both professionally and personally.

"It's amazing how public figures recover from scandals like this," he says. "Tiger, we all believe is a really good guy, and we're trying to understand why he could have done this. Hopefully he'll help us understand this with time. I think he needs to come out with a fuller explanation. People do not like cover-ups."

In the meantime, Pinsky says Tiger and his wife should get the proper help.

"Find a way to recommit to your marriage and get some help," he advises Tiger. "Do so with the knowledge that the outcomes can be very, very good."

"Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew" airs Sundays on VH1.

 

[Tom Iron]

It seems with black people, it's only a matter of time before they go off the deep end. No matter how successful they may seem. It's always just an illusion. The only unknown factor seems to, just what is it the black will do. It could be anything from murder, to absolute bafoonery.

I don't play or follow golf, but I was impressed with Tiger Woods for awhile until a local writer, Phil Mushnick of the NY Post wrote articles saying that there were all sorts of negative things about Woods (long before this present mess) that nobody in the TV media or advertising field would talk about. Well, I guess he was right after all.

Tom Iron...

 

[Westside]

Here is the long story short: Super mega athelet/affelet then shortly thereafter...........Oh, I thought this guy was different. They never are. Kobe, Jordan, Ali, and so on. Can't control the crank or be faithful.

 

[white is right]

Ali was so bad the media couldn't cover up for him. His ultimate brazen act was declaring his gomar Veronica Porsche as his wife to President Marcos while he was still married to Belinda Ali....

As for Jordan there wasn't a road tart that he didn't devour...

Yes the shy secretive ones can be the worst ie Woods or the workaholic Albert. Well at least Woods hasn't descended into an alternative lifestyle(yet) like Albert.....

 

[Westside]

I forgot the prolific "Johnny Apple Seeder" Evander Holyfield. This guy has 9 kids from 8 different affelet lovers!!!

This sorted harem and collection of brownies will slowy but surely bankrupt him. This is the reason a 46 year old is plying his trade with fists flying into his mug. For God sake stop with the fornicating(atleast use a condom) and fighting already!!

 

[WASP]

-Edited by: WASP

 

[Westside]

Welcome to the boards WASP, and that is quite a post, very detailed and to the point!!(pun intended)Wow.

 

[DixieDestroyer]

WASP, welcome to Caste Football sir!

Here's some more dirt on the Woods fiasco...

Woods Neighbors Say He Was Lying in the Road....Snoring

Edited by: DixieDestroyer

 

[Europe]

I am so tired DWfs supporting all these guys like Woods who are trying to take white woman away from them. He must have had 100's before he was married and I'll be they were 99% white.

I also don't like the support that Brady and Roethslinburger get for their womanizing. They are just hording woman. People praise them for "sowing their wild oats". These guys aer laughint at us, while they get all them woman and all them money. I would never pay money to watch these guys.

 

[white is right]

I forgot the prolific "Johnny Apple Seeder" Evander Holyfield. This guy has 9 kids from 8 different affelet lovers!!!

This sorted harem and collection of brownies will slowy but surely bankrupt him. This is the reason a 46 year old is plying his trade with fists flying into his mug. For God sake stop with the fornicating(atleast use a condom) and fighting already!!

Philanderer Oldyfield always confused me. I know god said go forth and multiply but didn't he state fornication and adultery was a sin. Since when did the ten commandments become a buffet line.....

 

[white is right]

Well a 4th mistress emerged today and there are rumours of a 5th and a 6th and now this crazyness....Tiger Woods ‘took sleeping pills to boost sex life with mistress'
By ANI
December 5th, 2009


MELBOURNE - Ace golfer Tiger Woods took prescription drugs to give his sex life with one of his alleged mistresses a boost, it has emerged.

According to media reports, New York nightclub promoter Rachel Uchitel, 34, told friends she and Woods took the sleeping pill Ambien before having sex.

"You know you have crazier sex on Ambien - you get into that Ambien haze. We have crazy Ambien sex,"Â￾ she is quoted as saying.

RadarOnline website made the claims, reports The Daily Mail.

Party organiser Kalika Moquin and Los Angeles wienertail waitress Jaimee Grubbs, 24, have also been named as his mistresses, The Daily Telegraph reported.

Meanwhile, news reports have come in claiming that he had five more flings, including a British telly presenter. (ANI)

 

[WASP]

-Edited by: WASP

 

[WASP]

-Edited by: WASP

 

[whiteathlete33]

I was reading my local paper today and surprise there was another article on Woods. It made me sick to my stomach. The article mentioned how black women despise Woods for having affairs with two white women and being married to a white woman. Blacks consider Woods as "black" even though he is only a quarter negro. On top of that it seems like the bruvas are making fun of Woods on radio shows. The article also mentioned how blacks are against any interracial marriages. That's fine and all because I am against them too but shouldn't they be labeled as racists as well. What a bunch of crap.

 

[Deadlift]

My personal view is that Parneviks should be beaten to a bloody pulp for "setting-up" this miscegenation.

It can't really come as a surprise that boot-lipped - TannedEveryman - Charlatan Woods - would look in the mirror and then go out to seek "comfort" from many females. This self-destructive behavior from someone who is likely a self-hater was quite predictable. But, you see, this wouldn't really matter if it wasn't for Parneviks.

I don't think anyone cares that Charlatan has an Asian mom. Blacks can knock-up small, inferior, Asian women for all I care. Charlatan is a complete CHARLATAN when it comes to race and this really showed itself several months ago... He praised the "growing mixed race population of America" - but he didn't take a wife from this (gene pool) that he praises? Who the heck does he think he's fooling?

Oh, let me guess, in Charlatan's view - "mixing is great as long as I can get a bunch of White women!" If that is so, Charlatan, then you are admitting the INFERIORITY of women/offspring that are MIXED! Now, I'm not saying that all his skanks are White/Jewish, but none are probably negress. Truthfully, one can never trust a "man" that is racially retarded/perverted. NEVER. This is also why Dirk Nowitzki can't be trusted anymore. He might never have made "pro-White" statements or openly fought for more White representation in basketball, but his "situation" - which was likely fueled by "White Guilt" - was utterly embarrassing and moronic and showed the world that significant self-hatred may be inside of him.

Now, everyone is allowed to have some insecurities and self-doubt, but Charlatan's and Dirk's "situations" go well beyond the norm of human struggle, and they both deserve to be side-by-side on an unflattering poster or billboard. Come on, Dirk could have gotten a lovely White Texas girl, but I guess it would be "racist" for a White man to marry a White woman. Tom Brady? What's wrong with Tom Brady?..

I know this post isn't PC, but I don't think it's out-of-line. And, yeah, Charlatan probably does shoot-up ROIDS.

 

[whiteathlete33]

Deadlift what are you talking about in regards to Dirk?

 

[Deadlift]

He was with the Planet of the Apes skank!

Thanks jaxvid!

You are awesome!