2014 Michigan Wolverines

Phall

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Sep 19, 2012
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Michigan football sucks. The Wolverines will start five White offensive lineman and also a blocking fullback in some formations. Defensively, their three White starters are clearly among the four top players. Jake Ryan had a decent half-season last year coming back from a knee surgery; if he is healthy, he'll play on Sundays in 2015. Desmond Morgan's career has been a pleasant surprise at strongside linebacker. He is smart on the field, positioning himself well and rarely missing tackles. Internet fans refer to this as "playing within his limitations," so congratulations to him for that. Brennen Beyer played so well as Ryan's injury replacement at middle linebacker that the team moved him to SDE to keep him on the field. He is undersized for that position but will drop into short coverage to give the defense a few different looks.

Michigan has one year left of senior black quarterback Devin Gardner, who has never quite lived up to the five star billing bestowed upon him at age 16. On a better roster, he'd be playing wide receiver, but it is still unlikely that backup sophomore Shane Morris can supplant him and return the depth chart there to an exclusively White position. Expect Gardner to receive unwarranted Heisman hype when he scores a few times, even though his accuracy is average and his decision-making is relatively atrocious. Some NFL team will eventually take him on "Day Two" in a fit of excitement, but I'd be surprised if he has any pro success without switching positions. For any of you doubting his academic prowess, you should be aware that Gardner has already earned a double-major in African and Afro-American Studies.

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The running backs, wide receivers, and defensive secondary scholarship players are 100% black, with no serious chance of that changing under this coaching regime. The projection for the future will be White quarterbacks, black skill position players, a 2/3 White o-line, and a few token Whites in the defensive front seven that will coincidentally be the best players on the field.

Ex-running back Wyatt Shallman showcases as a quintessential caste victim. Ranked the #6 recruit in the state of Michigan, Shallman committed early to the Wolverines, who did indeed offer him with intent to give him some carries, or the opportunity to earn some carries... whatever they are calling it these days. The coaching staff honored his commitment by recruiting over him immediately, adding a pair of "superstar" backs to his class in Derrick Green and DeVeon Smith. Both saw carries of their own last season as true freshmen last year while Shallman redshirted. He was working out with the fullbacks before another position switch to tight end, where he is currently somewhere between 3rd and 5th in the pecking order. Personally, I was expecting the top in-state rusher to be able to make a contribution to an above-average team with a young depth chart, but apparently I was wrong and the rest of the internet was right - he is "too slow" and "oversized," as evidenced by all his weight fluctuations. Maybe if he keeps his chin down and works hard enough, he might someday in the future be permitted to block for the black titans of the gene pool.

Another theme of Michigan football this season will be the job security of the coaching staff and athletic director. This has more to do with college football tradition than racial politics, but is interesting regardless. AD Dave Brandon, former top dog at Dominos Pizza, has brought a mass-marketing mentality to this old-time program, inserting advertising billboards in all empty spaces, installing posh designer box suites, piping in generic party rock anthems over the loudspeaker rather than relying on the band, and a small matter of tripling the price of tickets overall. A failed proposal for a postgame fireworks display was graciously vetoed by the board of regents. Shockingly, ticket sales have in fact suffered, and the biggest football stadium in the country will be relying on Groupon deals and 2-for-1's to keep up appearances. Michigan has a new school president, a jew with a lengthy STEM background who probably doesn't care so much about sports. So while a 10-3 record might get everyone contract extensions, an 8-5 season might spark a full round of housecleaning. I am not sure which option is preferable to the typical fan.

With an entrenched black quarterback and the emergence of WR/TE hybrid Devin Funchess as the new sliced bread, there is little for a pro-White fan to care for, despite the three lunchpail linebackers who will fill up the stat sheet or the White linemen who will volunteer for blame after each pick-six. There is no reason to root for this squad over the Big Ten conference's multiple superior options.
 

Jack Lambert

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Jan 3, 2009
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Just a bit of an update, as Michigan just released a new depth chart. Matthew Godin has apparently won a starting DT job. Joe Bolden will be starting over Desmond Morgan at WLB as well on defense. So the Wolverines will have four playbook-studying and lunch pail toting white players starting on defense.

The depth chart also has Wyatt Shallman as the starting H-Back.
 

Leonardfan

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Jul 30, 2006
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22,970
Hopefully Shane Morris takes over at QB at some point. Gardner is a bad qb.
 
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